Sunday 4 March 2012

The Daleks' Master Plan: The Abandoned Planet


Me:  Right. 

Him:  Fed up with Daleks. 

Me:  Nearly there. 

Following a deep breath, we recap.  The switched is pulled and it’s on with the whiteout.  It all goes a bit strange here – the picture comes back and everyone’s looking at each other while swirly music drifts around the TARDIS.  

The DARDIS returns to the Dalek base on Kembel.  Mavic Chen emerges and flashes the taranium (obtained “with guile and cunning”) in the general direction of the Dalek Supreme. 


Mavic Chen:  Of course. 

Me:  “It’s from Uranus.” 

A final conference has been arranged, the delegates await Mavic Chen’s victory speech. 

Mavic Chen:  I shall go and address them.  Presently. 

Me:  “But first, some tea.” 

After Mavic Chen struts off, the Dalek Supreme, impatient to get going, arranges for the taranium core to be fitted to the time destructor.  The Obeying Dalek has a quick, long overdue, query. 


The Dalek Supreme says no.  Mavic Chen’s still useful to them – blinded as he is to what’s actually going on. 

Back on the TARDIS, the Doctor has removed the, now burned-out, directional unit.  They can’t get back to Kembel after all. 

Steven:  That means the Daleks can invade the universe and conquer it. 

The Doctor:  Yeees… 

The question still remains though - where are they?  Now that the scanner’s been fixed, they can have a look.  Blimey!  Could it be… Kembel?  That would be a stroke of luck. 

There’s a quick argument about whether it was the Doctor or Sara who thought they’d failed (it was the Doctor).  Steven moderates and the door is opened. 

Sara:  That man!  He was as much in the dark as we were and now he has the gall to- 

Steven:  Very good.  You’re getting to know him quite well. 

In the Davros Room, disgruntled delegates await the arrival of Mavic Chen.  There are a few familiar faces: Malpha’s back, Celation’s hissing and- 

Me:  Christmas tree! 

A meaningless motion is passed (seeing as no-one seems aware of who’s really in charge) and the delegates celebrate by covering Adam and the Ants. 
Kings of the Final Frontier

Dalek Supreme:  SI-LENCE! 

Mavic Chen, finally, addresses the meeting.  Celation grumbles about being left in the dark and Mavic Chen uses this opportunity to score a point. 

Mavic Chen:  Though we are all equal partners with the Daleks on this great conquest, some of us… are more equal than others. 

Me:  That’s from Animal Farm. 

Trouble’s brewing.  Mavic Chen officially declares himself to be the best.  The other delegates don’t take this very well and call for Mavic Chen to be arrested.  There’s more drumming and then, as they advance, a gun is fired and Gearon is killed. 
Ah, Gearon, we hardly knew ye.
Him:  ‘Gearon’?  I don’t remember him at all. 

Mavic Chen lowers the gun, his coup a success. 

Our heroes have landed on what appears to be an abandoned planet.  There aren’t any Varga around.  The Doctor’s vanished as well. 

The delegates continue bemoaning their lots. 

Celation:  We have all served (hiss) the common cause! (hiss)  All of us! 

Mavic Chen:  Indeed we have.  But I, Mavic Chen, was solely responsible for the recovery of the core of the time destructor. 

Celation points out that Mavic Chen is trapped as well.  Mavic Chen attempts to ignore this.  The Daleks come in and tell everyone to shut up and come with them. 

Sara and Steven can’t find the Doctor anywhere.  They decided to visit the city and see what’s going on. 

Steven:  Just a minute… 

Him:  “Just a minute!” 

Me:  There’s been plenty of repetition, hesitation and deviation in this epic. 

Sara and Steven come upon an unguarded entrance.  Something’s wrong – the whole city’s deserted.  After walking down many corridors they find the control room, and the DARDIS. 

Sara makes an announcement over the Dalek PA system and receives a reply. 

Mavic Chen:  KINGDOM! 

The delegates are arguing.  They ask to be rescued. 

Mavic Chen:  It’s not a trick! 

Sara and Steven – I keep forgetting to mention that Sara appears to have fallen in love with Steven – prepare to release the Galactic Council.  The scheming Galactic Council. 

Mavic Chen’s convinced that Sara’s come to save him.  Sara reckons they should let them out. 

Me:  “How could you not trust us?” 

The delegates agree to fight the Daleks and are released.  Off to their ships they scurry.  Mavic Chen offers to reward Sara but she’s having none of it. 

The delegate ships leave.  Suddenly, Mavic Chen’s ship explodes and ominous music starts. 

Steven and Sara suddenly spot a Dalek.  They’ve not left after all.  The two chums follow it to a tunnel that leads under a mountain.  In a sudden double-whammy nearly-at-the-story’s-final-cliff-hanger moment, Mavic Chen pops up and captures them. 

Mavic Chen:  I am alive!  And soon shall be MASTER OF THE UNIVERSE!!

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